Link Saturday

Slow day today, so let's see what that crazy internet has to offer.

For some reason this list of potential sports team names makes me smile.
These are some of the strangest songs I have ever seen.
This list of censored Looney Tunes cartoons is evidence of an alarming amount of free time. Although I found this rather puzzling:

"FOX deleted this cartoon's final scene, of the mouse and the cat pouring gravy down the dog's throat. They say, 'This time, we didn't forget the gravy!'"

Why on earth was that cut? Does gravy have some sort of racist connotation I'm not aware of?
That being said, this cut was kind of justified:

"This whole scene is deleted: a frog is on a lilypad, and the narrator says, 'Here we have a close-up of a frog croaking.' Then, the frog shoots himself in the head with a gun."

He shot himself in the fucking head. That is kind of harsh for a kids cartoon.

This is cool. A dictionary of cockney rhyming slang. Very nice, but I don't think I'll be asking for a "gay and frisky," instead of whiskey, anytime soon. That would really go down well at the bar.

Yes, that is a very nice sheeps-head pez dispenser.

Okay, here is a directory of graphics.
Does anyone else find this one... odd?
And what is this guy's job? Creating fireballs with his mind?
And boy! Are these guys ever dynamic!
When the hell would you use this? "You're fired!"
Again: "You're fired!"
These are some threatening goddamned penguins.
This is kind of suggestive... ("How are you doing, boys and girls?")
The caption should read: "Aaaaahhhh! I'm on fire! Aaaahhhh!"
It's bad enough they're using a Native American as a sports mascot, but why is he doing kung fu?
This is the kind of clown who has to notify people when he moves into the neighborhood.
What in the hell is going on here?
"Go baaaack! Go baaaack!"
Is this really the best possible graphic to represent baseball?
Or football?
And why is this in the sports section? Or this?
"I'm going to cut off your fucking head, and put it in this fucking box!"
What exactly is he hunting for? That's kind of fucked up...
"Ahhh, that feels good!"
This is just confusing.

Hmm, that was surprisingly amusing. Moving on...

Did you think Alabama was just a state in the US? Surprise, bitch! It's also a Native American dialect!

"Termites are affected by music. They will eat your house twice as fast if you play loud music."

This site is fascinatingly dull.

A list of children's books. My favorites (100% real!):
"Are You My Mother?" - No
"I Hate Boots," - I hear ya, kid
"Penrod's Pants," - Hey, keep your distance there, Penrod.
"More Spaghetti, I Say!" - "No, more, godammit! More!"
"Penrod Again," - I'm fucking warning you, Penrod...
"I Stink!" - Jesus, take it easy there, champ.
"No Mail for Mitchell," - Pooooor Mitchell.
"Hey, Al," - Al: "What?"
"No Tooth, No Quarter!" - Kids bugging ya, there, chief?
"Ira Sleeps Over," - That sounds ominous...
"Lazy Lions, Lucky Lambs," - If they were unlucky, the lions would tear the lambs to shreds.
"Suddenly!" - ...you're a middle aged childrens book writer with a bad liver and broken marriage!
"Hey! Get Off Our Train," - An early lesson in civil rights.
"Nuts to You!" - rejected title: "Hey, fuck you!"
"You're A Grownup (Pretend)," - You're not really a grownup.
"It Goes EEEEEEEE!" - "It" should probably stop going "EEEEEE" if it knows what's good for it.
"How Yossi Beat the Evil Urge," - Yossi should fill me in on the secret.
"Summer of Shame," - You sick, sick fuck...
"You're a Star (Pretend)," - You're not really a star.
"Locked in the Library!" - "For Christ's sakes, somebody help us!"
"Old Woman Who Loved to Read," - Settle down, kids, you'll all get your turn to read it.
"You're a Community Helper (Pretend)," - You don't actually help the community.
"Parents in the Pigpen, Pigs in the Tub,"- My life is a living hell
"Meet the Boxcar Children." - Uhhhh... no thanks.

Well, that's probably enough for now.