Say it Loud and Say it Proud! You're Married!

Okay, I'm a little apprehensive about broaching this topic, as the last time I brought it up it resulted in a screaming argument between my aunt and uncle, culminating in my aunt storming to the front door and proceeding to throw shoes at my uncle and me. I am not making this up.
But here goes: wedding rings. As I am in my mid-twenties, it is perfectly feasible that the women I hit on could be married. Therefore, I have developed the habit of looking for the ring when attempting to ascertain the availability of the young woman upon whom I am inflicting my advances. But this practice, which has been used by single people of both sexes for decades, if not centuries, has become woefully inadequate. Many married women have taken to wearing non-standard wedding rings, and many unmarried women who like wearing jewellery have taken to wearing rings (that signify nothing) on their 'ring fingers.' This is annoying.
My objection is prompted by an encounter with a lovely young woman, with whom I was flirting (and who, I may add, was flirting back). I subtly cast my eyes down to her hand and spotted only a thin silver ring. Being the old-fashioned fella I am, I decided this was not a wedding ring, as I was looking for the more traditional thick, gold, wedding band. Needless to say, I was wrong, and barking up the wrong tree *.
So what is a single boy to do? My aunt's suggestion, before she commenced hurling the footwear, was that I should just outright ask a woman if she's married. While admiring the forthrightness of this approach, I fear that it would rather tip my hand. To my mind, it would be somewhat akin to announcing: "I am going to hit on you, now," at the start of a conversation. But what's the alternative? Many women helpfully, if irritatingly, work their husbands or boyfriends into the conversation early on, so as to head one off at the pass, so to speak. But, many unavailable women enjoy flirting with single men (especially handsome, hairy, slightly off-putting ones), and so are hesitant to bring up the old man, and end the flirting prematurely.
I vote that we bring back the standard old, easily recognizable, wedding ring and make it mandatory for all married women. Also, i think burkas are a good idea, you wanton harlots.


*"Barking up the wrong tree." How come when someone meets someone eligible, attractive and interested in them, they do not say "I was barking up the correct tree." Just a thought.