In the land of the Frog

Woof! My goodness, I had a rocking hard-on of a night. First, when I got off work early I went for a long meandering walk through the french quarter of Winnipeg. I guess because of the strict french-language laws there are less chains and franchises there, so there were a few peculiar businesses. For example: "Deen's Calypso Gardens." I was kind of puzzled as it appeared to be a regular house. What was Deen offering exactly, besides Calypso? Next to the house there was a sign reading "No minors past this point." What's he building in there?
I also saw a sign for an infrared sauna, offering to burn 600 calories, guaranteed! Sounds kind of brutal.
The most intriguing sign was stenciled onto the side of a garage. It read, simply, "Beware Dog." Perhaps there is a comma missing, and he was telling his guileless pooch to be more cautious. I like to think that he was trying to warn the rest of us that his dog was dangerous but he couldn't even get through the full sign.
"Beware... ahhh! Goddammit, boy, down! Down! Ahhhhhhh! My leg! Ahhhhh! Fuck it! 'Dog!' 'Beware Dog!' You happy, boy? Ahhhhhh! Someone help! Ahhhhhhhh!"
Poor sunavabitch.